What was your experience as a child?
What is the parenting style you use with your children? What was the parenting style that your parents used to raise you? Can you discern similarities and differences?
Do I want my children to experience life as mostly a threat? Are there age appropriate behavioral expectation? Can children learn to perceive and regulate emotions?
The key question is... How does the parenting style affect the development of emotional resilience?
Exploring the styles
Permissive
Parents believe that the child is Inherently good and no limits or guidance is really needed.
As a natural process, love and respect and self-discipline will emerge. They do not believe healthy boundaries and age appropriate behavioral expectations are needed.
Authoritarian
Children should be manipulated to achieve self-discipline in order to survive a harsh and dangerous world. In their view sustainable-short term compliance is not possibility. Therefore rules need to be applied in a rigid way.
Authoritative
Parents believe that there are inherent possibilities to be cultivated, so love and limits are necessary. Parents nurture the good compassionately and temper the bad, helping innate capacities such emotional intelligence to be developed. The result can be acting better personally but also in socially intelligent ways.